Monday, 21 April 2014

30 Things Nobody Wants To Admit To

1. Leaving your hair a week between washes, then using dry shampoo to buy some time.

2. Preaching about personal hygiene on one of your dry shampoo days.

3. Accidentally wearing your underwear inside out.

4. Leaving your dirty dishes for a few days.

5. Purchasing singlets from a cheap, skank-ridden teenage store.

6. The lingering foul smell that entered the room at the exact moment you went quiet and / or awkwardly laughed.

7. Wearing your bed-hair in public and accepting compliments on your 'new style'.

8. Eating confectionery for dinner.

9. Irrational fear when the packaging of your favourite confectionery is redesigned.

10. Vomiting on your tuxedo. More than once.

11. Being more attached to your hair than some of your family members.

12. Feeling like it's Christmas morning when your typing speed or Excel knowledge improves.

13. Phone / laptop usage whilst in the bathroom.

14. Being completely weirded out by someone casually touching you.

15. Entering your apartment as fast as Usain Bolt when you hear a neighbour coming.

16. Purchasing new underwear to avoid doing laundry.

17. Never checking the oil level in your car.

18. Thinking about someone less than they think about you.

19. Thinking about someone more than they think about you.

20. Thinking about confectionery more than you think about your SO.

21. Eating a sausage roll for breakfast on your way to the office.

22. Awareness of Miley Cyrus' existence.

23. Fearing a terrorist organisation that targets cultures / religions other than your own.

24. Losing sleep over the fear of being attacked by aforementioned terrorist organisations.

25. Singing whist driving.

26. Rapping whilst driving (even though no one could ever be as bad as Lil Wayne).

27. Originally typing 'wrapping' when referring to the music genre... #swag

28. That one movie you love. Something along the lines of Human Centipede or Waterworld messed up stuff.

29. Feeling more comfortable around strangers than an acquaintance you bump into on the regular.

30. The hair surrounding your shower drain.

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