Saturday, 8 February 2014

24 Hour Social Hibernation

Social Hibernation is a concept I'm not too familiar with. To be perfectly honest, I would have spelled the word 'hibernation' incorrectly if it wasn't for spell check. Despite my lack of experience, I've started to really enjoy the time I spend alone. As such, I pencilled in a social hibernation for the weekend. Below is a timeline of events that lead to my failure.

Saturday
6:00am
Sadly, I can't actually hibernate because I have a cat. After half an hour of relentless meowing and pawing at my face, I agree to get her breakfast in exchange for some peace and quite.

6:05am
Back to bed.

7:10am
My mother calls. FML. After 26 minutes of polite mumbling, she gets the hint and leaves me alone. I have a little sip of NyQuil to avoid any further interruptions.

10:32am
That was a good nap. I check out Facebook & Instagram, then dose off again.

11:22am
I'm awoken by another phone call. Perhaps social hibernation would be more effective if I mentioned it to my social circle or put my phone on do not disturb. After chatting, I get lost on a Thought Catalogue tangent and end up falling asleep again.

1:15pm
I drag my arse out of bed to run some errands and do a bit of exercise... only because I have an ongoing competition and I'm currently losing.

3:00pm
Gossip Girl marathon – I accidentally lose 5 hours. How did that happen?

8:00pm
I decide to write about my day in the hope that it will stave off any guilt about being so lazy. I manage to come up with the words above and plan to subject you to them as some kind of cruel joke... Sorry about that.

9:19pm
My step brother messages me. He's at a club in the Valley, ten minutes from my house. It would be rude not to go, right?

10:25pm
I enter the club. I have an awesome night involving shots, slinkies, 90s music, a high school reunion, the Getaway Plan and random conversations with alternative boys.

4:00am
I get home.

6:00am
I'm awoken by my cat.

There's no denying my social hibernation was a failure. I won't be attempting it again any time soon. Now I'm left with a headache, an arm full of club stamps and a midday meeting that I can't reschedule. Where's the KFC at?!

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